She wore a white moo-moo
She also wore a bonnet
And old tattered scuffed-up shoes
Her skin was pale from head to toe
Her hair up in a bun
The only bit of color
Was a red neck from the sun
Maw Jane got no attention
Until that Christmas morn
She tripped her skirts flew o're her head
Was like lookin' at Amish porn
Nothing's ever been so shocking
Maw Jane had kept a secret
She wore pink and green striped stockings
